Me: Not now, Maddie, I’m working on my blog.
Normally I’m a huge fan of irony*.
But not in this case.
I pride myself on being an engaged parent. But, to be honest, it’s been tough lately. Mainly because we have a 5-month old baby, Juliet, in the house now, and I’m also in job-search mode. So, this all equals less time for one very needy 4 1/2 year old, Madeleine Sue, who has been given all the time in the world up to now. Big changes are afoot, and we are all feeling the growing pains.
Admittedly, we have been extremely lucky. We have been able to live off the income of one parent while the other stays home, mostly, to raise our daughter. We have had family support, financially, emotionally, and physically. We have attended regular family counseling sessions. How anyone can live in the Bay Area without some from of support is beyond me.
But now I’m feeling some of the pressure that so many families feel…I need to find a job. Hence my stress and my quick replies to my daughter lately.
I have enjoyed the past 4 1/2 years tremendously. Now, this chapter in our lives is ending. It’s scary, and hard to let go, but I am excited about the future.
It’s important, now more than ever, to be aware of all those small moments in the day when my daughter seeks connection. She must know that I will still be there for her. To be her dad is, after all, the best job in the world.
*to help those of us who are irony-impaired, let me elaborate. Picture a dad working on his blog, who’s sole purpose it is to celebrate fatherhood with amusing and touching stories of engaging with your children, then mumbling something a la W.C.Fields – “Get out of here, kid, you’re botherin’ me” – to his daughter, who is gently tugging on his shirt, like some poor little orphan girl. Now THAT’S irony, folks!